And I almost made it...

In the cancer world, one of the most frequent metrics is 5-year survival rate, or DFS (disease-free survival). Although we all know people who have had recurrences both before and after the 5 year mark, my father-in-law told me that actuaries, who determine things like when a cancer survivor can again buy life insurance, must be onto something or they wouldn't use that 5 year marker. So it's a pretty big milestone.

Since my surgery was January 8, 2015, I count that as my cancer-free day, or my cancerversary. This January would not only be 5 years since my double mastectomy, but also the month of my 50th birthday. I was vacillating between how I wanted to celebrate these two milestones. Did I want to throw a big party with all my friends? Or did I want to do a getaway somewhere warm and sunny with just Greg?

This Tuesday was my routine 6 month check-up (and Zometa infusion) with Dr. Shah. When I met with her and we went through the symptom checklist, I told her how I'd been more sick this fall than I can remember ever being. She asked some other questions (fevers? chills? more tired than usual? headaches?) and decided that, although she didn't think it would show anything, she was going to have me get scans (brain MRI and abdominal CT) and would run blood tests for tumor markers just to put us both at ease.

The beautiful view of the Lake out of the infusion bay window at Ascension

And then my blood tests (CBC) came back. My counts were off. My red blood cells, hemoglobin and hematocrit were all low. My platelets, normally low, were frighteningly low (20K). I told Dr. Shah that the nurse had had trouble getting blood and that it's possible the blood clotted in the tube. She looked relieved and had them draw another tube. Unfortunately, it, too, showed extremely low RBC and platelets. She said she wanted to have the hospital lab examine a smear, and could I wait? Was my husband available?

The smear came back showing blasts and consistent with acute leukemia.

Of the long list of things that could happen post-cancer, this was (is) not something on my radar--at least not once I got a year out of treatment. Two of the chemos that I had for my breast cancer treatment (adriamycin and cytoxan) carry a very small (~0.5%) chance of causing leukemia in the ten years following administration. Lucky me. A whole new series of challenges and treatments.

I was so close.  So damn close...