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Explant done! And hopefully my last breast-related surgery.

When I first started researching implant removal, I joined a Facebook group called "Flat & Fabulous." Unfortunately I look neither flat nor fabulous right now. I look like someone took a giant melon baller to my chest and left me with a double bowl for serving dip.

About that uneven, too

I'm a little embarrassed to say that I teared up when I first saw how I looked. I'm not sure what I expected, but I guess I was hoping for some miraculous outcome. Unfortunately my previous surgeries resulted in scar tissue and skin sticking to the muscle, and (I think) 4 1/2 years of having expanders and implants pushing on my ribs may have also pushed them in. My mom used to tease my dad about having a "chicken chest" because his sternum stuck out so far. I guess I'm more like my dad than I thought.

But it's done, and I'm happy--I really am. If you read online about "breast implant illness," you'll read all sorts of testimonials from women whose symptoms of every sort of malady all disappeared the minute their implants were removed. As Greg, Cara and I were waiting for me to be wheeled into surgery, we started making a list of all the things that would result from having my implants removed.
1. No more feeling that I had a stack of books on my chest
2. No more extreme tightness in my shoulders
3. A disappearance of the bruised feeling from my neck to my belly button and down my arm
4. Ability to run again as I'd no longer have joint aches
5. Feeling that I was smart again as the brain fog lifted
6. Shiny, thick and lustrous hair
7. Perfect vision with no need for glasses
8. Promotion at work
9. Winning the lottery
etc...

The first one came true, so I'm just waiting for the others.

Waiting for surgery; using the "Bair Hugger" to amuse Cara

About the surgery:
Unlike my first surgery (7 hours) or my third surgery (4 1/2 hours), this one was only two hours long. In addition, I learned what worked and didn't work from my previous surgeries. And the anesthesiology team was awesome, for the most part.

My stupid veins required FOUR pokes before they got a good IV. So I'm pretty bruised from that. I explained my vomit-phobia and how when I got a nausea patch it helped with the nausea but then I couldn't focus my eyes for three days, but then when I didn't have a patch, I was nauseous all day. So they used fewer narcotics during the surgery, and some extra anti-nausea meds. Although I was insanely sleepy (kept dozing off and hard to wake up from anesthesia), I was NOT at all queasy--which I consider a small miracle.

I had asked to not have my jaw cranked open with the breathing tube like with surgery #1 that resulted in TMJ and a mouth guard for a year, and the anesthesiologist mentioned some form of non-invasive "breathing assist," but Dr. Kinney wanted me intubated. It doesn't seem to have messed up my jaw this time, but my throat is super scratchy and painful (although already better today than yesterday). It's a good excuse to eat soup and ice cream shakes!

Dr. Kinney does several things differently than Dr. Sterkin. Perhaps the best is that he uses Tegaderm over the place where the drains go in, so I was already able to shower today! He prefers not to use a foley catheter (YAY!) and doesn't routinely prescribe oral antibiotics, only putting them in the IV during surgery, so no stinky sulfa drugs! And at least for this surgery, I don't have to wear the horrible, binding, rash-inducing compression garment! Additionally, I've learned since my previous surgeries to use a lanyard to clip my drains to (instead of pinning to my shirt) and that's much more comfortable, too. I can honestly say that I feel much better on Day 2 this time around than I have after any other surgery (except maybe my local anesthesia revision).

Pain has been almost non-existent. There were obviously meds in my IV, but I didn't even take a pain med prescription from Dr. Kinney (That's another difference between him and Sterkin. Dr. Sterkin asked me if I needed more Percocet every visit for the first 3 months. When I told Dr. Kinney that I didn't want to take them and only used Tylenol last surgery, he said that was great and he liked when his patients didn't need stronger meds.)  I took two Tylenol last night before bed, but haven't needed anything since. The only thing causing me pain is my right arm. When I woke up in recovery, that was what I complained about. I think it must have been cranked back during surgery and I have a history of rotator cuff pain. I didn't think to mention it since it hadn't been bothering me. But it was all I could think about when I could stay awake--distractingly painful. And it woke me up in the middle of the night, too. :(  I'd like to be able to loosen it up, but I'm not sure how much I can move my shoulder, as I'm not supposed to move my arms much for healing.

Greg, rubbing my sore right arm as I complained about it after surgery

So there's my update. Thank you to everyone who texted, send messages or comments on Facebook, snail mailed me, and thought about me. I am constantly uplifted by what an amazing tribe I have. This week Cara and Greg and Ash are tag-teaming taking care of me--cooking, shopping, driving, helping me get shirts on, reaching high things. I'll be off work until next Wednesday (the drains come out next Tuesday, fingers crossed). I'm encouraged to walk, so if anyone wants to take walks in the next week, I'll probably be home and up for it.

I'm relieved to have made it to this stage in my journey and would be glad to talk to anyone making decisions about their own surgery and reconstruction. I'm happy to share photos, too, but don't want to put them out in public. Hopefully as I heal, things will appear less drastic. If not, I have some time this week to whip out some knitted knockers, and I can always moonlight as a chip & dip dish. :)