And it's gone

From the time I was diagnosed, I joked about losing my hair.  Bright side of breast cancer treatment?  New, perkier breasts and possibly new, less-gray, maybe curly hair afterwards.  :)  I did not think it would bother me in the least--especially since the hair loss is just temporary.

So I was surprised that it hit me harder than I'd expected.  I'd assumed that as soon as the hair loss was apparent, I'd shave my head and get it all over with.  But as some of the hair started to drop (on Thursday and Friday), I found myself clinging to what was left, and wondering if I'd be one of the people whose hair just got thinner and didn't leave entirely.  However, yesterday, as I sat in the backyard, tugging at my hair to stop the itching, I realized that wasn't going to be the case.  

As I tried to find the silver lining in this latest stop on the breast cancer express, I came up with this:  I'd actually been a bit concerned that the chemo wasn't doing anything.  I was expecting horrible side effects and a miserable couple of months (which I realize could still happen), but I'd only had some minor ickiness and blocks of time feeling bad.  This--the hair loss--is indisputable proof that the chemo is going in, coursing through my veins, and affecting the fast-growing cells as it should.  This is good.  This is comforting.

Then this morning in the shower, I looked down to see a pile at my feet.  And when my hair dried after the shower, there was an awful lot of scalp showing.  Definitely time to go.

So Greg put on some Sinead O'Connor, and shaved my head.  

I'm not quite ready for the bald-reveal yet--at least not on the internets.  I'm sure I'll get there in time.  For now, I guess I'm happy that it's cold enough that I'll want to wear a hat or scarf. My dear friend Katie, a cancer and chemo survivor herself, gave me the gift of a wonderfully warm, soft hat made by Turtle Fur, and that's what I'm rockin' for now.

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My appetite is still pretty good.  The hardest thing is keeping hydrated, because I've just never been one to drink much (alcoholic or non-alcoholic!  LOL).  So I end up eating soups, as they are comforting, nutrient-rich, and hydrating.  I bought another giant pack of bone-in chicken thighs yesterday and made another double batch of bone broth per the recipe in The Cancer Fighting Kitchen.  Popsicles are a good fall-back, too.  I've also stocked up on fresh fruits and veggies so when the steroid food rage hits this time, I will try to eat less calorie-dense foods.  

Today I found out that just cooking was about as good as actually eating.  I made all sorts of stuff:  Crockpot pork and gravy, nokedli, and broccoli cauliflower casserole plus berry crisp for supper tonight.  It felt good to be in the kitchen!

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And I'd not posted our choice of binge-watching TV since completing Buffy.  We will eventually move on to watch Angel, but needed a break from that.  So we watched Transparent.  And I really enjoyed it!  We're open to suggestions for other binge-watching.  We have Amazon Prime--not Netflix.  I also want to go back and re-watch Big Love again since it's been years since the last time.